New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Randomize
