what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Randomize
