My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
