thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Randomize
