Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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