Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Oh god it's open bar.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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