ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
