dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Randomize
