at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize