Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize