just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
