I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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