How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
