You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Randomize
