I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
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