i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize