honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
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