i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize