He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Randomize
