i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
