Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Randomize
