Kareoke will never be a sober sport
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
