i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
