i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
