Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
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