Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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