forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
