one might say we're banned from that church
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Randomize