So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
