If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
