One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Randomize
