yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Drunk is not a location!
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Randomize
