Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
