thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Randomize
