sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
You made out with two different species that night
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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