I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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