Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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