He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
