i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
