if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
