There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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