peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Randomize
