it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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