She announced her abortion via fbk
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Can I color on your dick again?
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Randomize
