That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize