I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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