yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Randomize
