all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
