:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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