Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
