I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
